Monday, May 20, 2013

Be silent, or say something better than silence.

It is necessary to one’s personal happiness to exercise control over one’s words as well as acts for there are words that strike even harder than blows. There are words which pierce hearts more than sharp swords do. There are words the point of which sting the heart through the course a whole life. The turn of a sentence can decide the fate of many a friendship and the fate of many a kingdom. A Spanish proverb says, “A goose quill often hurts more than a lion’s claw.”

It s really true in seeking the good of others we find our own. The cheerful man makes a cheerful world, a gloomy man a gloomy one. A person returning from an evening party complained to a policeman on his beat than an ill-looking fellow was following him, it turned to be his own shadow.

And such usually is human life to each of us. It is for the most part, but the refection of us. Although cheerfulness of disposition is a matter of inborn temperament, it is also capable of being trained and cultivated like any other habit we may make the best of life or make the worst of it, and it depends very much upon ourselves whether we extract joy or misery from it. Sir Walter Scott was man full of the milk of human kindness. He relates one incident of his boyhood. One day a dog coming towards him, he took up a big stone, threw it, and hit the dog. The poor creature had strength enough left to crawl up to him and lick his feet, although he saw its leg was broken. This incident had given him the bitterest remorse in his life.  

The influence of woman is the same everywhere. Her condition influences the morals, manners and the character of the people in all countries. Where she is debased, society is debased, where she is morally pure and enlightened, society will be proportionately elevated. Woman can no more do men’s special work in the world than man can do woman’s. You observe a man becoming day by day richer or increasing in professional reputation and you set him down as a successful man in life. But if his home is an ill-regulated one, where no links of affection extend throughout the family, I contend, that man has not been successful. Man enters a new world of joy sympathy and human interest, through the porch of love. The utmost blessing that God can confer on a man is the possession of a good and pious wife, with whom he may live in peace to whom he may confide his whole possession, even his life and welfare.

Lady Rachel Russell is a woman is in history celebrated for her devotion and faithfulness. She labored and pleaded for her husband’s release. But when she saw that all was in vain, she collected her courage, and strove by her example to strengthen her dear lord, the husband. When his last hour had nearly come, his wife and children waited to receive his parting embrace concealed the agony under a seeming composure; they parted, after a tender adieu, in silence. After she had gone, Lord William said, “Now the bitterness of death is passed”. Lady Russell received the dead body of her beloved without a head, after a couple of hours.
One of the most painful ordeals of man’s temper and patience was that which took place in Abruzzi, a natural philosopher at Geneva. He devoted much study to the barometer and its variations. During 27 years, he made numerous observations daily, recording them on sheets prepared for the purpose. One day, when a new servant was installed in the house. She immediately started displaying her devotion by putting things to rights. When he entered his room, he asked of the servant, “What have you done with the paper that was round the barometer”? Oh, sir, it was so dirty that i burnt it and put in its place these new papers”.

Abruzzi crossed his arms and said calmly after some moments of internal struggle, “you have destroyed the result of 17 yrs’ labor, in future touch nothing whatever in this room”.

Use ‘I’ statements not ‘you’ statements to discuss your anger. Say “I feel angry when my needs are not being met” instead of “you make me and when you are so inconsiderate”. Forgive and forget. Forgiving helps lower blood pressure and erase muscle tension so you can feel more relaxed. Up to 80 percent of people, who commit suicide, mention their intentions to someone. People who are considering their intentions to someone. People, who are considering suicide, are often undecided about choosing life or death. With your timely compassionate help, they may choose to live.

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